Let’s start what Christmas isn’t. It isn’t showy presents, and buying our kids the latest gadgets. It isn’t breaking our backs to make sure everyone is happy and forgetting about ourselves. It isn’t drinking too much, or eating every food you can get your hands on. It isn’t food shopping at 6am on Christmas Eve, it isn’t bragging that you are all done half way through December. It’s certainly not about a naughty elf getting into trouble around the house every night. And newsflash here – it’s not about the 25th December.
It also isn’t about about the birth of Jesus anymore. This isn’t a religious rant, or a way to teach you about what the bible tells us about what happened. There are many that celebrate this time of year for what happened in a manger in Bethlehem 2000 years ago. But there are also many more that celebrate this time of year in a secular way, with no manger, shepherds or donkeys. Just a big man, in a red suit with a bushy white beard. Both are just as important, but both also run into the trap of forgetting the true meaning of why we celebrate at this time of year.
So in this modern day society we live in, what is the true meaning of Christmas and how can we show future generations not to fall in to the pit of commercialism?
Many say that Christmas is about giving, this comes from the gifts the shepherds and Wise men bought the baby in the stable, it comes from stories of Babushka and of Saint Nicholas. But I don’t remember any of these stories featuring piles and piles of gifts, and people going into debt to get the right present.
Others say that Christmas is about being with your family, but none of the ancient stories of the season feature families. Joseph and Mary were alone in that stable, they weren’t staying with family, they were visited by complete strangers. Babushka is a lonely old lady, living in the forest on her own. Father Christmas doesn’t have time to make up spare room beds, or find extra chairs for distant relatives does he!
Saying that Christmas is all about family and giving puts an enormous amount of pressure on everyone. Pressure to find that perfect gift, to spend more money, to not disappoint our children. Pressure to buy for everyone you know, the teachers, the scout leaders, the neighbours, your friends as well as your family. It means that we feel we should spend it with certain people, and that can lead to immense stress. Not everyone gets on with their family and for some there may be no family at all. And then where does that leave them? Again, pressure to conform to things that don’t make us happy.
And what’s the big deal with 25th December as well? It’s highly unlikely that Jesus was actually born on that day, Winter Solstice is the 22nd December, so why do we put so much pressure on that date? Christmas shouldn’t be about cramming everything into that one day, we have no problem with celebrating our own birthdays on different days, especially if it falls mid week, we will often then celebrate at the weekend. So why do we put so much pressure on 25th December?
There is a little known story about the Christmas Rose that symbolises to me what Christmas should really be about. Even if you are the most atheist of all, keep reading, as it will easily apply to you too. There is a legend of a girl called Madelon who also visited the stable. But when she saw that others, the shepherds and the wise men, had gifts to give, she was sad to have come empty handed and ran off to find something to give. As it was winter, she couldn’t even find flowers to take. She sat and cried. As the tears fell onto the snowy ground, flowers appeared. Star shaped white petals, tinged with pink. She took them as a gift and was told;
“No gold, no frankincense, no myrrh, is as precious, or as fitting a gift as these pure blooms that are born from of love and hope.”
You see it’s all about love and hope. Hope that things can grow out of love, even in the harshest of environments and the saddest of times.
That can happen on whatever day of the year you wish to celebrate it, with whoever you want. So if you are a blended family, and your children are with their other parent on the 25th, make Christmas whenever you can. If you or your loved ones are working on Christmas day, then celebrate the fact that they are spreading the true message of love and hope and see them when you can. If you live too far away from family then spend it with friends instead.
We can give presents as a symbol of love, but remember the origins of the festival and keep it simple. We don’t have to buy our love, it comes from deep within our hearts.
Enjoy all the traditions, the colour, the food, the excitement, the red and green, the twinkly lights and the wonderful chaotic mess, if you wish to do so. But also search out the quiet, the peace and the tranquillity and remember what it is really about.
Love and hope isn’t restricted to one day of the year, nor is it bound by distance. Let Christmas time be one of many days, of small acts of kindness, the spreading of love and looking forward with hope.
